Today was a hard day. If you ask me why though, I can’t pin point the reason. It was just one of those days that you wish was different. I recently had someone ask me with everything going on in my life, how I remained so positive? I try my best, but sometimes the darkness creeps in.
I don’t have many days like today, and I honestly think they are a way of telling me to step back, take a good look at what’s going on, rest, and make any necessary changes. After I have done that, it’s time to get back in the game.
Today my legs hurt. For my adoring fans who have not spent a lot of time with me, you may not know, but I don’t move quickly. At one point in my life a dear friend of mine used to call me Eeyore. It’s true, Pooh’s buddy and I do move at the same pace. I was never really sure why, but after we completed our parental genetic testing for Ella, we were both found to have a mutation that affects speed and muscles (that is the long and short of it) . They told us Ella would never be a marathon runner, and I would just be slow moving.
In addition to that, I have lymphedema in my legs. About a year before Steve and I got married my ankles started swelling to triple the size of my legs. At first they thought it was water retention, but after seeing a vascular doctor, just to be safe, we realized it was not. It seemed a little unusual because I was told that typically some type of trauma brings it on, and I could recall no such thing. I guess I was just unlucky.
Standing made me horribly swollen, and the pain unbearable. My sister-in-law randomly worked at a hospital with one of the only people in the area who does lymphatic massage, Allison. I was able to get in to see her, and she truly changed my life. Each session she gently massaged the key spots in the lymphatic system. At the end she would focus a lot on my ankles, and always wrapped them nice and tight before I left. I would wake up the next morning with supermodel legs.
I also wore compression socks each day to try and reduce the swelling. You could tell when it had been a bad day though because above the sock would be nice and swollen. Over time, the swelling became barely noticeable and I ditched the socks. However, I did walk down the aisle in white compression socks and sneakers. There was zero chance my swollen feet were going to make it in heels.
For years I was good, until I wasn’t. I found my way back to Allison, and time had been kind for people with lymphedema. They now have a device that essentially does everything Allison did, but in the comfort of your own home. The best part was that it was fully covered by my insurance. I ordered it, was trained how to use it, and still pull it out for treatments when my legs get achy and swollen. I do miss Allison though. That hour with her was my me time. I have named my machine Alley, in her honor.
To this day I don’t know the trigger or why I go through spurts of good and bad. I believe it’s all part of my body trying to slow me down. When I am hooked up to the machine, it’s a mandatory hour of down time.
Tonight I will take that time to reset myself and hopefully wake up refreshed. Pushing myself too hard is good for no one. We all need time to rest, our bodies and our minds. Today was my turn!
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